A Letter From a Truck
by Apex Capital | March 10, 2015
My dearest Citizen,
It is I, Ted the Truck, otherwise known as a Big-Rig, Semi-Truck, or 18-wheeler. I noticed you watching me in your rear view mirror and couldn’t help but notice how uneasy you seem lately. I can understand why you might be uncomfortable cruising down the highway next to me, the media has been pretty harsh lately.
But I just want to talk to you and explain what’s going on. There’s no reason to be scared, of me or my brothers and sisters. We would never intentionally harm you. We’re just built a little different, that doesn’t mean we don’t want to be treated the same as everyone else. We should embrace our differences and work together to ensure everyone is safe on the roads we all share.
I know we’ve had our differences, please let me explain myself. Everyone has some pet peeves. We can’t help them. I don’t have many, but each one was exhausted that day and it just really took a toll on me. Please let me clear the air, and explain the things that irk me the most.
1. The other day, you kept skirting around into my blind spots. It’s not just annoying, but could potentially be very dangerous. For future reference, my blind spots are located to the right and rear of the vehicle, with smaller ones situated on the right front corner and mid-left side of the truck. If you could please try to stay out of, or at least move through those areas quickly, I would really appreciate it.
2. If you had asked, or simply waited a few moments, you could have gotten over with ease. But you cut me off so close I had to stress the brakes and almost swerved into another lane. Surely you wouldn’t have been that much later to your appointment had you waited for me to pass first? I wasn’t moving that slowly.
3. It really hurt me when you kept honking and even laughed at me as I tried to back into a very small docking bay. It’s a lot harder than it looks (think: driving a speedboat through flaming hoops while blind-folded and reciting a monologue from Hamlet). Getting it right the first time is like hitting the lottery.
4. My truck is really heavy. I know with your four wheels it may seem really easy to zip into the next lane over, when you suddenly remember you need milk and you’re passing the last convenience store before your house. So you do what most drivers would and you make the turn, brakes in action. Do you know what would happen if I tried that? Like tripping someone running at full speed, there’s nothing you can do to stop the carnage about to happen. And where do you think that flying truck will land? I can’t maneuver my 18 wheels like your four, and my size and weight make it almost impossible to stop quickly. I wouldn’t dream of hurting you, that’s why I need you to really understand this issue and how important it is to think proactively and check your surroundings at all times.
5. Remember that time we met up on the highway, and when I tried to get over you refused? I’m a big guy, I need some space sometimes. If you could just be so kind as to let me in, and if it’s not too much trouble, flash your lights so I know I have the distance to merge safely? It would mean more than you could possibly know!
I really respect our relationship, and I depend on you just as you depend on me. I think we can make this work, and communication is the first step. Let’s please forget about this spat and move forward with a healthier, happier relationship.
All my love,
Ted the Truck